A Painful Debate and a Word About Compassion

Following is a debate that a FB friend started (and a copy of my comment). It has so far gotten 80 comments, and caused some people to "unfriend" others. How sad. The comments ran anything from, "Who do you think you are?" to, "I totally agree" and anything in between. I decided to post the "debate" question and my comment here. I'm not looking to start a debate of my own, and I certainly don't want anyone "un-blog-friending" anyone. I just decided I had something to say. I know that many people have personal experience with this or (as I am) are very close to someone who does. I do not want to make light of that in any way. That pain is HUGE. I wish that we who are Christians would learn compassion. I wish I had learned it before it was too late for my friend. Actually, I hope and pray that it's not too late. I hope that she can find healing and be at peace one day. I hope that anyone who reads this needing the lesson I learned can learn it from my mistake. And for anyone who is in the kind of pain I describe here, I have learned my lesson. I would be happy to talk and pray with you.

The debate:
So just for debates sake, lets say you are pro-choice. You believe women have the right to choose what happens to their bodies. What happens when another human being becomes involved? You wouldn't allow a woman to choose to kill her CHILD. So now lets just say that the "fetus" you are carrying happens to be a female, where is her right to choose?

My comment:
In essence, I agree with the fact that abortion is a horrible thing and shouldn't ever happen. However, I think the one thing missing in this debate is compassion for those who've felt compelled to make that choice, and for those who love and sympathize with them. I know this from experience. I used to think only of sticking up for what was "right" - the problem is that in doing so I hurt a woman who carried secret pain bigger than anything you can likely imagine unless you've been there. She'd heard so many comments like mine that she felt hopelessly worthless and that God couldn't possibly forgive her. What I said was like stabbing a knife in her already broken heart. Of course, I didn't know it at the time. She just lashed out at me about how women should have a choice, and how could I be so unfair as to say that when a woman is raped she should not have an abortion.
I didn't find out until later that I'd added to her immense pain.
I could have said the same thing, but with compassion and understanding, adding that we have a God who is full of compassion and love, and forgives us for Jesus' sake. Instead I gave the Enemy the opportunity to attack her further, and imbed the lie deeper that she was nothing, worth nothing...
She later tried to commint suicide and is as of yet steeped in alcaholism and depression, lied to all the time that she's worthless and nobody could ever love her.
Don't forget the pain that these women suffer every day of their lives. Tell the truth, but with compassion. Who really cares if people decide you're morally right, the question is are you sharing the Love of the Savior with them? Are they being healed and set free? Do you truly love others like you love yourself?
How I wish I could take those callous words back, and instead share the miracle of hope and healing through Jesus with her...
Thanks for starting this very worthwhile discussion! :) Blessings!